Exhausted

I’m running out of energy very quickly lately. To the point where I’m tempted to say that I don’t have any left. I’m having to force myself to do everything, and it’s getting more and more difficult. When I’m not working, I’m usually sleeping. When actually awake and not at work, I don’t really do anything, I just half-watch some tv-show or do some easy bits in a game.

Twice a week I have to get up at 5.30 rather than the usual 7. And then do a full day’s work, alone at the office. It’s stressful work, and I’m not handling it well. This morning there was a difficult thing to solve, and I was struggling a lot. I was feeling so tired and worn down that for a while I could do nothing but cry.

Last night I was crying too. I’m just feeling so tired, and that in turn makes me feel frustrated. But most of all I just feel tired.

It’s an awful feeling when you’re feeling so tired that all you want to do is sit in a corner and cry. Or maybe sleep. Sleep sounds good.

Your argument is invalid

So… I came across this on my Facebook feed the other day.

spanking

Whenever I see these, I have to grind my teeth. You know what? I was never spanked as a child, and guess what? I also have respect for others. So do a lot of people who were never spanked. There are also a lot of people out there who were spanked, who don’t have respect for others.

So, really. Your stupid post means nothing.

If we’re going by the logic in that image, then we can pick any random thing that happened to you and say that it formed you in some way. Then pretend like because it had X effect on you, it should have the same effect on everyone else. Sure, the post doesn’t explicitly state that people who are spanked have respect for others, and people who aren’t don’t. But it’s heavily implied.

I just don’t think that corporal punishment automatically makes someone a better behaved person. If anything, I’m leaning towards it just making you fear your parents, rather than actually understanding the difference between good and bad. You just know that you shouldn’t hit your little brother because then someone will hit you.

I don’t know. I know corporal punishment is very common in a lot of countries. But I just don’t think it’s the answer to why people are rude and misbehaved. I’ve seen kids that I know are spanked who are equally rude and misbehaved to kids who aren’t.

Since the difference seem minimal at best, I’m just tempted to say there’s no point to corporal punishment. Admittedly I’m biased, since I live in a country where corporal punishment is illegal. Funnily enough though, our kids aren’t less well-behaved than others. (Come on, most kids are little monsters, no matter what!)

What do you guys think? Do you think corporal punishment make for more well behaved children?

Aww

The boyfriend’s mother sent me a photo on Facebook with this adorable clock that she’d bought for us. It’s perfect for me, since I love pretty much anything with owls on it. It’s also the first new thing that the boyfriend and I got for our joint home. Still some time before we actually have a home, but it’s a start!

Obviously we’re both bringing a whole bunch of stuff with us into the home. But this clock feels special since it’s the first new thing that’s not been in either of our homes previously. It’s “ours” instead of something I bring or he brings.

Call me sentimental, but it makes me go “aaww”. Not to mention how sweet it was of her to think of us (ie. me) when seeing an owl clock!

Too cute!

Too cute!

Dragon Age

With my internet being so awful, I’ve been playing very little World of Warcraft and decided to instead start on my backlog of other games. First off was Dragon Age: Origins, and I have to admit that I’m still playing it. I can’t believe I never got around to playing it before. I absolutely love it!

You can talk to huge-ass trees!

You can talk to huge-ass trees!

I’ve played it through once, and now I’ve started a second playthrough since I was a Rogue the first time around, and now I’m trying Mage. Since decisions make the story slightly different, I also try to make slightly different ones – without making my character into one that I don’t like. I’m considering a third playthrough as a male Warrior so that I can try out romancing Morrigan.

I’ll be honest, I was a bit disappointed that you couldn’t romance Duncan early on in the game. But as I got further in, I forgave them the transgression because, Alistair. Need I say more? I love the romance between your Warden and Alistair if you decide to go down that route.

Aaww! Look at them!

Aaww! Look at them!

My second playthrough I had planned to romance Leliana, but that story wasn’t nearly as fun. In comparison to my Alistair romance, it actually felt rather boring. So… I may have left her for Alistair. At one point I thought about romancing Zevran. But. Alistair.

Sorry, Leliana. I just can't do this!

Sorry, Leliana. I just can’t do this!

So yeah. I guess I’m an Alistair addict. Can you blame me?

Oh, Alistair. Did you have a bad dream again?

Oh, Alistair. Did you have a bad dream again?

Moa’s First Birthday

Today my little niece, Moa, turned one. I can’t believe it’s already been a year since she came into the world. Time really does fly by at times.

We celebrated yesterday though, since she lives with her mom – and she seemed to enjoy herself. Mom had made her a special little birthday cake, just for her – which she devoured, making a big mess. As you’re meant to as a one year old.

Why do I never get a cake all to myself btw? Favouritism! That’s why!

The cake that everyone else got to eat. So pretty.

The cake that everyone else got to eat. So pretty.

Auditioning for "Let's Dance"?

Auditioning for “Let’s Dance”?

"A cake? Just for me!?"

“A cake? Just for me!?”

Nom nom! Eating her very own cake.

Nom nom!

Hi! I'm 1 now!

Hi! I’m a whole year old now!

Playing with big brother Viggo.

Playing with big brother Viggo.

Current Addiction

As always, I’m late to the party in finding another TV-show that I enjoy. I think this one is currently on its seventh season, but in a way that’s just great – since it means more for me to watch!

The show I’m talking about is Castle, and I have to say that I’m really enjoying it. In it you can see Nathan Fillion (from Firefly) starring as the best-selling crime novelist Richard Castle. The first episode has a murderer killing people in the same way that Castle did in some of his books, which makes him the focus of the investigation. He’s quickly discovered not to be guilty though, and gets to consult on the case, since who would know these murders better than he?

This is the start of a collaboration between him and the police department. As the show continues he gets to stick around and “consult” on cases, as research for his novels. (All thanks to him being friends with the Mayor.)

The show is really funny, while also having interesting murder mysteries every week. I especially enjoy Castle interacting with the police detectives, since he often has a different idea of the crimes. “It wouldn’t make for a good story”, is one of his common complaints when he doesn’t feel that they’ve found the correct solution.

Him being a writer also gives us gems like, “Whoever killed this woman, also murdered the English language.” (The killer had written things on the victims forehead, but the grammar was bad.)

Another thing I enjoy in the show is that Castle isn’t an Alpha male. Sure, he’s famous, handsome and can get almost any woman he wants. But he’s not macho. He will let out some very girly screams at times, and I love it. Nathan Fillion does this part so incredibly well.

If you’re looking for another show to watch, definitely give Castle a try!

Castle-Season-3

It’s 2015

And suddenly I’ve not written for a month. I’ve managed to get myself some manner of internet. It’s a mobile connection, but a very bad one since this area doesn’t even have 3G. Some days when the weather is bad I still can’t do anything, but other days at least I can get online enough to play a little bit of World of Warcraft, check a few blogs and chat with the boyfriend on Skype. Though not at the same time, the connection can only handle one thing at a time generally.

It’s insane how long it can take to load a page though. Maybe part of the reason my blogging has been bad is that it takes so long to load. I had to wait a couple of minutes before I could start typing this post, for example. It must be what connections were like back when we had dial-up 56k modems. Though this feels worse. But surely that must be because now we’re used to better, cause I can’t imagine that this is that much worse than a 56k connection. (That is pretty much the speed it has though.)

Since last time I wrote I spent three weeks together with the boyfriend, which was awesome. It sucks afterwards though, since we had time to get used to being around one another – only to now be apart again. Which makes it even worse than before. It’s only been a little over a week since he went back home, but it feels like months since we last saw each other.

First, I spent one week in the UK with him, where we went the wedding of one of his friends. He then returned to Sweden with me and celebrated Christmas and New Year’s with my family. It was really nice having him here. It was the first time I’d celebrated with a significant other, so that was cool as well.

Xmas2014-2

And now, it’s suddenly 2015. I guess I will spend the next… six months or so still trying to realise that it’s actually 2015. Time moves too fast sometimes, while feeling too slow at others.

I haven’t made any New Year’s resolutions. I generally don’t, and this year is no different. However, this year is the year I move to the UK to be with the love of my life – so that’s a resolution of sorts. I guess? Or maybe just something I’m doing. In either case, a lot to do this year in preparation for the big move!

I hope that everyone else has had a lovely holiday period!

Xmas2014-1

Snowstorm

Lately I’ve been working longer days on Tuesdays and Thursdays, starting at 6.30 – which means driving into work while it’s still very dark (and very early!).

Today it wasn’t just dark, there was a snowstorm ongoing. I hate driving in snowstorms. During the day I can deal with them, for the most part. But when it’s dark, your headlights will light them up so much you can’t really see anything other than a million white flakes whirling around you. Visibility is awful.

snowstorm

Borrowed from Flickr, to give an idea for those not accustomed to snowstorms!

First snowstorm of the winter though. We’ve had a little bit of snow now and then, but it never lasted more than a few days. It’s still snowing out now, but not so much. I guess we’ll see if this snow sticks around.

I do hope we will have a little snow over Christmas. Not massive amounts, but a little bit – to give us a nice, snowy Christmas. Especially since it will be the boyfriend’s first Christmas in Sweden. So, I need it to make a good impression!

Dinner time

Yesterday was the annual Nobel banquet, which follows the Nobel Prize ceremony every year. My mom decided to host her own mini-version of it, as a fun little thing. And yes, she even had the banquet showing on the TV in the background.

dinner

I’m impressed by how much time she must have spent on it, on a work night. Since it included both a starter, a main and a dessert!

You won’t hear me complaining though. I never say no to not having to cook!

This is my life now

I’m having a bit of a feeling sorry for myself, pity party. It feels weird to go from having a whole apartment to just one room. And everything is still a bit of a mess.

The actual move was awful. With my CFS and stuff I had a really hard time getting everything done in a timely manner. It didn’t help that I’d agreed to let the new tenant in to start renovations straight away. It meant me having to try to gather the last bits and do the cleaning with the place full of tools, floors pulled up and items scattered.

I still have lots of stuff that need to be taken to the town dump, but I need help since I don’t know how to drive with a trailer. It’s stressing me out. The new tenant is whining, but I can’t move it (it’s on a trailer outside, to the side so not really in the way) until I get help and it has to be a day that the dump is open. I wish they’d show some good will since I gave them access a week early, when not even done myself.

The whole thing is making me walk around with a feeling of perpetual panic.

It doesn’t help that I can’t talk to the boyfriend much. With us having virtually no internet I have gone from chatting to him for hours every night to an hour twice a week. It’s awful. I miss him terribly.

Right now my life feels pretty awful. Maybe once everything with the old place is finally settled, and the new room is more in order things will feel better. But for now I’m feeling pretty lonely and stressed out.